Wednesday, March 17, 2010

When I get where I'm going

Every post needs a picture and while this isn't the picture I was looking for, it is a happy picture and I am hoping you have a happy St. Patrick's Day.
Last night I was reminiscing with a friend about Elise's hair when she was little so I guess that's why I stopped on this one and didn't keep looking for a picture of Stephen.
This Friday would have been Stephen's 19th birthday.
Monday I was overwhelmed with grief for my sister's son.
Tuesday was a little better but was still much more intense than I thought possible.

"Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:1 has been painful.

I don't have time today to grieve, this post will be all.
The weeks following Stephen's death this song helped, but Monday night durring my walk it opened the floodgates of grief that I didn't know was there. Tuesday's walk was almost a repeat.
Last November when I told Cathron about the song she said Stephen would have liked it because it dealt with Jacob's struggle with God that he had related to so tenderly. But this week when I listened to it all I could hear was Cathron's struggle.
"The thing I love you erase
Nothing but a empty space
Now I don"t know how to be"

Josh has always said he wants his death to be a celebration, and I patronizingly go a long with what he's saying...knowing the theology behind his reasoning.

Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

A friend from church just called and spontaneously we are going out to lunch, for today, grief time is over.

Still working on this month's Bible memory verse. I think I am going to be realistic and only going to work on one a month. That's where I am at.

We, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory,
are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory,
which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.
2 Cor. 3:18

1 comment:

sister sheri said...

Oh, my. Thank you for sharing that Kirk Franklin song... Wow! I'm about undone! And the Brad Paisley, too.

I didn't realize how important it can be to share what music touches our heart... our lives. Thank you! I'm heading to iTunes!

Wish I could hug you. And your sister, too.