Monday, June 27, 2011

Heart Beats

Last week I got an email from our church administrator...
Would I be willing to read the scripture in the next service?
Heart beat increase...
"Okay," I said but "are you setting me up to read a verse about submission or keeping quiet?" I asked him....At our church in Palm Bay that is completely something Phil would have done.
So Thursday evening I get the scripture: Deut 6:1-16
I read through it once Thursday night and when I got to verse 10 I had a little hiccup.
with great and good cities that you did not build, 11 and houses full of all good things that you did not fill, and cisterns that you did not dig, and vineyards and olive trees that you did not plant
There is so much we are given either materially or spiritually that we are not responsible for!
Read it through again and it didn't have the same welling of emotion...whew I thought, that could be a problem.
I listened to it on the ESV online site and read it out loud and nary had one quivering thought.
Yeah, well it didn't end up that way when it was time for me to go up and read it.
For no reason what so ever I am nervous when I get up there and my heart is beating hard and fast, it feels hard to take a breath. Slow down I tell myself, breath I tell myself. But when I get to verse 10 my voice starts quivering, tears well up in my eyes and I have to pause to take a deep breath.
Nice recovery Stewart said.
I asked him how embarrassed I should be...he didn't want to answer that question.
Instead he said, "How does it relate to Stephen?'
For the past year and half he knows when tears well and I am all choked up it is because something has reminded me of Stephen so he was trying to figure out how cisterns related to him? It didn't but now that I think about it, it fits as well.
It's just part of the greater picture that nothing we have is ours, it all belongs to God to do all His Holy will with to His Glory and if we think for a minute that it is ours we are greatly mistaken.

Be confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1 : 6


sister sheri said...

How insightful of Stewart! And how true to think that all we have ever had is given to us by our loving Heavenly Father. Praying for comfort.

AllThingsHomey said...

The last two Sundays when the person (a different one each time) read the scriptures for the day, became chocked up when reading the old testment verses. Each time, our Pastor almost choked up as he spoke because he had just witnessed the Holy spirit at work. He is the One who sensitizes our spirit and speaks through us.
xo xo xo just another proud mama.